True Confessions of a Total Loser, Slacker

I know. It's been over two weeks. If you think that is the only thing that I haven't done in the past two weeks, you are sadly mistaken. The truth be told, it has been way longer than two weeks since I have done things that were probably much more important than blogging. Plans were big for the long MLK weekend. I had big plans to clean house, do laundry, clean out the refrigerator, complete a couple of DYI decorating projects, read, and in between--squeeze in Alex's basketball tournament.

My downhill slide actually began when we returned from Colorado. I really never recovered before school started January 5. I somehow stayed awake (I do mean that literally) for the first week back to school (and remember with snow days and holidays it was the first five day week in almost a month!), but nothing really was accomplished on the home front at nights and then I had to take Rachel shopping on that Saturday, and we had Jeff's party Sunday and then it was quickly back to school again. (Believe me, that two days seemed to go at lightening speed compared the last break of three weeks we'd had.) Between trying to work five days in a row for a second consecutive week and going to high school games and hauling my two children to practices for four different sports- my immune system was surely weakening. Last Friday night Rachel had a birthday party to attend and Alex had a couple of boys over for the night. I made them homemade pizza and we took them to the high school boys game and stayed up, later than we should have, just talking with them. I mean, how many nights will our middle school son and his friends want to just hang out with Jeff and me and tell all? I got up the next morning, made the boys a good breakfast since they were playing ball all day, and decided to leave all of the dirty dishes because I would be home early to accomplish all of the big plans.

Then it hit. The sneezing had come the day before, but I thought it was just allergies. Then there was the runny nose and before I knew it the throat was a little scratchy. By the time we were home Saturday afternoon the fever and achy twins were here and I was done. And so were all of the big plans. Basically I spent the rest of the weekend whining about what a loser I was and how I wasn't getting anything done and how if I could just get some sleep it would be fine. It's never fun when you are busy and can't keep up with household duties, but it's even worse when you're sick and can't do anything but lay around and stare at the mess. Tuesday came and I went back to work feeling better and when I came home I cleaned all of those dirty dishes that had piled up over the weekend. That night the kids went with Jeff to a high school game and I was so tired I was sure I'd sleep while they were gone and it was quiet.

Then it hit. My big energy spurt. I cleaned house, cleaned out the refrigerator, did laundry, mopped floors and made a grocery list. I had finally accomplished something! I finally felt better about myself as a wife, a mother and a person again!

Except I had forgotten that our new Bible study with the girls at church was starting the next evening and I had not read Esther, read the Bible study book or done any of the study guide. I knew I had to spend the next afternoon grocery shopping and picking up the kids so there was no time to prepare and soon I was at Bible study telling everyone what a total loser, slacker I was because I was unprepared. Now that I think about it, I wonder if Esther ever felt like a total loser, slacker. I kind of hope so. Because if she did, there just might be hope for me. After all, God had big plans to use Esther in a mighty way and if He had plans for her, I know He has plans for me too. He says so in Jeremiah 29:11 and I'm really glad He is not a total loser, slacker when it comes to His big plans!